Define: Hangry

Hangry adj. : The mental state in which one becomes angry due to hunger.

That is what happened to me earlier today. By 6:00pm when I got off work, my mental state morphed into hangry.  I needed food and I needed it immediately.

I had planned to go to dinner at a burger joint called Bunsen with my friend Jeff.  Jeff said the he would meet me by 7:15 at Bunsen, but 7:15 came and went. And so did 7:30. By 7:45, I had sent him several highly worded text messages explaining the situation.  Bunsen had a ton of people in it waiting to be seated; I was sick of waiting on his butt, and I just wanted food.  With steam blowing from my ears, I made the executive decision to meet him closer to City Center at a Mexican restaurant called Acapulco.

By 8:00pm, a full 45 minutes after supposed meet up at Bunsen and 2 hours past hangry, I  turned into a zombie looking for the next human.  I warned Jeff upon his arrival that I had only eaten EasyMac, had a cup of coffee, and a cup of hot chocolate all day and that I was in no place to entertain his late butt. I only cared to hear that my order would be coming up soon. Nothing that he said mattered.

The waiter judged me  as I ordered my nachos to have chicken, cheese, and salsa only.  How dare this apple-shaped human being judge me and my order.  Does he not see that I am hangry? Please, come at me bro. Once our food was ordered, my mental state slowly became more normal as I knew food would soon be before me.  What seemed like an hour later, a giant plate of chicken nachos was presented to me in grand fashion.  Maybe it was the hangry state I was in, but I swear there were fireworks in the room.  A unicorn galloped by, and a real life leprechaun brought me a pot of gold.  It was the best moment of my life. FOOODD!!!!!!

A grand total of maybe five minutes later, my plate was bone dry.  I somehow managed to swallow my entire dinner within three bites.  Think the Walking Dead Season 2 finale. I didn’t care what I looked like as Jeff gabbed on about his weekend trip to Galway.  All I knew was cheesy nacho goodness was being forcibly shoved into my mouth, and it was glorious.

Thinking back on it now, I’m 97% sure I didn’t use my fork until the very end. I just fingered that stuff up like the hangry human I was.  Am I ashamed? I probably should be, but it was just too darn good to care. My hangry state soon subsided, and I returned to the normal happy-go-lucky-sometimes-awkward person that I am.